misfits living in a world of fire || faye&liv

Not to over dramatise things, Liv’s life had gone to the dump. Her relationships were all strained - she didn’t know where she had turned wrong. There was something of her that hadn’t come out of the zombie apocalypse - Liv had changed. Maybe she wasn’t as upset anymore, but she was different. She felt different. Liv couldn’t quite put her finger on it, not like the way other people had changed. She was just different. Liv could see that the fire had died in a lot of her friend’s eyes. That life had become mundane. She never felt like that before. It scared Liv, like she was wearing glasses that made the world black and white. There was a streak of blood that Liv would never be able to wash off her hands. She would always bear that with her like a weight on her back, the mark of a loss of her innocence. A loss of her joy.

Liv couldn’t lie, she wasn’t the worst of them all. Her changes, while horrible all the same, were harder to detect. Faye was so quiet, so sad. Her brother was so angry. Liv had never seen him angry the way he was - like something had taken him over and left him unable to cooperate with anyone. He no longer wanted to be her friend, he no longer wanted to be her brother and that broke Liv’s heart inside. What use was a twin who pretended he didn’t know you? Before the ZA, Quell and Liv understood each other. They tried to ignore each other as much as possible in public, but they still could have full conversations in complete silence, using hand gestures to communicate. Liv couldn’t do that anymore, Quell didn’t understand her- or more, she didn’t understand him. She was losing every connection she ever had to her brother. He wasn’t her twin anymore, he wasn’t her brother, he wasn’t even her friend. Quell had become a complete stranger.

She didn’t realize how much she needed these people until they were gone - and Liv found herself approaching Faye in the mess hall after weeks of silence. Faye was angry with her at her response to James’ return, but who could blame the girl? She had a sharp aim and temper issues to match. And James had hurt her best friend, so it was only right that Liv payed him back, in full. ”Hi.” Liv said, sitting down next to her sister. She wouldn’t be surprised if Faye up and left, but at least Liv had to give it a shot.

Liv studied Faye for a few minutes, noticing the dark bags running above her cheeks, and how her jaw seemed more set now, not as soft as it had all those years ago when Liv and Faye had first met. It felt like a different lifetime. Even surrounded by all the monsters, Liv had been safe, secure and sound. Now that feeling of safety had dissipated as quickly as the zombies had come. There was something else about Faye that had changed. It wasn't something that someone who only knew Faye vaguely would be able to put their finger on, but Livia knew Faye better than that. And she was good at reading people. It wasn't just the girl's mannerisms that had changed. There was a look in her eyes, looking both harder and softer than she ever had been as a child. Faye had seen the harshness of the world and had survived.

At least Liv hoped she knew Faye that well. They had both changed so much. Livia barely knew herself anymore, how could she say she knew Faye that way? Even if Faye was her best friend in the entire world. Including Quell, who, come to think about it, probably couldn't even be considered a friend anymore. He was her brother and a stranger. When Liv looked in the mirror, she didn't see herself. She saw a stranger with sharp features, hallowed eyes and cheeks. Her pupils used to be a harsh stormy grey, but seemed more watery now. The stubbornness in her face had been softened by lack of sleep and she looked worn out, not changed from battle scars. She looked like the type of girl that people gave sad smiles to, like one of her parents had just died.

Liv didn't smile, but felt a warmness inside her that was so unfamiliar to her. "I agree." Liv muttered, trying to come up with some cool history fact to add to it, but Liv was blanking and instead just added an awkward pause. "Well I'm not dead yet." Livia had meant that to be funny, but it wasn't and she decided against smiling and seeming like a psychopath to the only person who willingly talked to her. Except for Nik of course. At least Liv hoped that was the case.

"Well I did try to beat up your boyfriend and then he almost killed me." Liv said quietly, nodding. She was glad that Faye didn't mind what she had done. "I mean, you didn't honestly expect a better reaction from me, did you?" Liv didn't have to any parts of herself from Faye, it was as if Faye already knew everything about her already. Liv didn't smile at that, since she was serious, but gave a small smile as Faye said something about Nik. "Shut up." Liv said, crossing her arms over her chest and throwing her head back. "Who told you?" Liv asked accusingly, but it wasn't a harsh tone as it could have been.