Those bloody hands of mine (Jason)

Subject: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Fri Oct 11, 2013 11:28 pm

Livia,

Livia crossed her arms around her chest trying to drown out the sound of silence with the non-existent hussle and bussle of the Athena cabin. Today the cabin was in silence. Livia sensed that her siblings were still in the cabin, but most did not dare approach her. The girl with tears dripping down her still slightly dirty face was one to be left alone.

Livia knew that Quell had purposely ditched her. Despite his denial, it was not hard to tell the look on her brother’s face throughout the day. Livia was getting annoying to Quell, and she knew that. But she couldn’t stand being alone and rolling in the muddy pit of her own feelings.

The silence reminded her all too much of the zombies. Not that they were silent exactly, only that the silence was a constant reminder of her half-brother, dead upon the ground at her hands. She stared at her hand in shock. They were stained with blood. Livia could not wash it off her hands, no matter how hard she scrubbed. They were pink and her skin was raw and tender from scrubbing them, but she could not get the image of her half-brother’s blood on her hands off. Her eyes would be forever stained with those splatters. Of course, Livia did not actually have any blood on her hands. In the metaphorical sense, her hands were no longer innocent. Livia had slain plenty of monsters before this, but killing her kin in cold blood (especially because she thought it was her twin brother) was not something that Livia tried to remember.

The thought that roamed through her empty mind when attempting to make noise failed was only about the boy. ‘Who was he?’ she asked herself over and over again, put to no avail. The boy’s face was void of emotion, and all Livia had seen in his face was how much he looked like Quell. Trying to remember would only make her sob, which Livia had been trying so hard not to do. She did not want to remember those horrible moments. More than anything, Livia wanted to forget how she had looked, horrified at the body on the ground and practically collapsed. She wiped a tear off her cheek, but let the rest run down. Maybe they would cleanse her, although Livia did not believe in any of those superstitions.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

John walked calmly towards his cabin, huxleigh right on his heels. The dog continually ran her nose into the back of the boy's leg, sensing something was wrong with her master. She even let out a small concerned yip every now and then for him. But the boy practically ignored her. He limped back towards his cabin, his left leg dragging as it was useless due to being broken. Scratches all over his face, and a long cut scar on his throat. He was just now returning to camp after being trapped in the woods during the undead attack, the last one being the worst as John had barely survived. Saved by some ares punk.

He blinked back tears as he remembered the faces of the undead. Including his former friends who had fallen, his ex girlfriend who had also been slayed, and worst of all his father had been one of them. As he stepped up into the threshold of his cabin, a larger boy with a much deeper tone grabbed his shoulder. "Hey, next time you need saving from your dad trying to bite your face off while you scream like a little girl, le-" the boy was cut off as John spun and his sword extended, blade under his throat. "I've got no problem adding one more demigod to my kill list from those undead." John growls at the ares boy before shoving him off.

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:18 pm

Livia,

There was a bang as the screen door to the Athena cabin burst open, bringing a shout with it. Two boys stood at the threshold, both of them growling at each other in a hostile manner. Livia sat up to listen to their conversation. Her shoulderblades fell behind her immediately. Livia always had good posture, especially in comparison to her almost hunchbacked brother. It allowed her to keep her head high. Livia sniffled, wiping the dry tears from her face with a tissue. She took a deep breath and stood up. Her legs wobbled a little bit, as if unsure of how to support her body weight. Livia clutched the edge of a bunk bed, yet her arms felt like lead. She took a shaky step forward, balancing herself on the rim of the upper bunk. With each step Livia felt like she was going to collapse but she kept going.
Finally she managed to reach the doorway. She leaned her body against it, finding strength in the solid wood. Livia tried to speak but no words came out. She struggled several times until she could find the courage to speak. Livia tried to talk loudly enough so that the other boy could hear her, but it turned out as just a whisper. ”Break it up!” The first words she had spoken since the zombies had disintegrated came out as a jumble of words, but Livia felt stronger than she ever had. She could not change the past, but at least she held the power to affect the present. Livia looked at the boy with a sense of pity. She was pretty messed up herself, and on any normal day, she would have no problem threatening someone, but a death threat, especially now, seemed wrong to Livia. She shook her head slightly. No matter how rude the Ares children were, they all on the same side and it would be a sign of weakness to turn against each other.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

John looked at his half-sister he did not rechonzie. He nodded and shoved the ares boy off the stairs. "Don't forget what I said boy. I will not be as forgiving next time. " he says and slams the cabin door shut and walks to his bunk in a secluded corner of the room, and sat down. Huxleigh jumped up to her rightful spot at the foot of his bed. Jason looked at his half sister. "i HATE ares kids." he says

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Sun Oct 27, 2013 12:24 pm

Livia,

Livia returned to the cabin and sat down on one of the chairs that wasn’t totally ruined. She shook her head sadly. The Ares kids were nothing but bullies and cowards. But did Livia really hate them? The answer was, of course, no. The Ares kids took her in when Livia was on the verge of death. They housed her, and kept Faye and Quell safe, when Livia could not. The war god and his children had kept them safe from the zombies. No matter how badly they might have treated her in the past, Livia could not bring herself to hate them. She had a newfound respect for the campers who she used to hate so very much. ”I don’t. Not anymore.” Livia looked at the ground with the sad resolve of someone who had gone through Hades to get her answer.

The Ares children weren’t all bad, and although they could be arrogant, Livia actually liked some of them. There was her friend Jack... although Livia didn’t quite know if he was more than a friend. And the more Liv thought about it, the sadder she got. She didn’t even know if Jack was alive, much less interested in her. She hoped he was. Livia hoped that everyone was, but that was a dream, not a reality. Livia now knew that the truth was hard and cold and would slam her face into the dirt. James, Faye’s boyfriend, had lost an arm. At least that’s what Livia thought from the whispers about the former cabin leaders going around camp.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

The boy looks up at Livia. "You probably have your own reasons. I may not agree but I respect your opinions." John said, he sat there as stared coldly out the window of the cabin. There were few people at camp he had ever opened up to. Even as much as he said to his sibling here was more than usual. And everybody else he opened up to was either out on a quest that they would probably never return from, or dead. He wasn't exactly in the most hopeful of moods. All this could be seen in the stormy gray eyes he directed towards the window.

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Wed Nov 06, 2013 6:31 pm

Livia,

”As you should.” Livia said, although the words tasted funny in her mouth. Livia stiffened up at the boy’s voice. Her composure was no longer confident the way she used to be. instead, she sat up straight and stiff at the edge of the chair and looked forward. Livia had to hide everything before she broke down, like she had when Quell died. Like she had for months. It was not summer anymore, and Livia must move on. But it was too hard for the girl. She was only 15, yet she carried the burden of the world upon her shoulders. It pressed to heavily for the girl to bear, yet if she tried to share it with anyone else, it would collapse on top of her, exploding her outward like a bomb. In a sense, Livia was a bomb. She was going to detonate at any moment, but she would give no warning for when she did. One day, Livia was going to explode, and there was nothing anyone could do about it. From now on, Livia would appear to be better at first glance, but she was slowly going to melt inside. Her shell would move on. Livia would not.

How could she? Livia had killed a boy. Granted, he was already dead, but still. Her own kin, her flesh and blood, had fell at her hands. Even worse, at the time Livia thought it was her twin brother. Livia could not shake the thought of the person she thought was her brother falling to the floor, her knife imbedded inside his heart. The feeling of dread that came from Livia’s heart was still there. It would not go away for a long, long time.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

John looked at how the girl reacted to everything. Then words just spilled out of his mouth "You're hiding something. I can tell from your posture. The false confidence. What's wrong? You can tell me, we all come from the same mother. Besides, we all have something we need to hide after the events that happened. " The boy says to his half sister, meanwhile his dog hops off his bed and makes her way to Livia. Setting a head on her leg with begging eyes look up at the girl

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Fri Nov 08, 2013 10:22 am

Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Tumblr_manytfaBIF1qdxxyt

Livia,

Livia’s shoulders sank back behind her as the boy read her posture. Livia hated people knowing what she was thinking, but she could not expect less from a child of Athena. After all, this one was of Livia’s talents too. Her brother’s dog came to her side and Livia gave the dog a gentle pat on the head, but then redrew her hand back into her lap. The boy was saying something - he was trying to get her to tell him. Livia could barely pay attention to the boy. How could he know anything. we all come from the same mother. He said. ”And we all go to the same hell.” Even in her wrecked state, Livia knew not to use the proper Greek terms in vain. She had been trained to never speak a god’s name in casual language, because they were always listening and they could always hear.

Livia’s jaw set. She could not tell the boy what was wrong, nor could she burden him with what she suffered from. Livia could barely bring herself to tell her twin brother or Faye what was wrong, let alone a complete stranger, especially if that complete stranger was her half-brother. But a whisper of the terror that Livia had faced might mean nothing to the boy, yet it would deflate some of Livia’s sadness, even just a little bit. ”Heroes don’t kill people John.” She said gravely. Livia took a wild guess with the boy’s name, but it seemed to match up with the boy’s face from what she had heard people call him.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

John looked at Livia. "Heroes also don't kill their father. I did. What's your point." he says. Maybe a bit too coldly, but his pain about killing his father, again, was an especially weak point in the boy's emotional armor. Huxleigh looked over at her inert with a confused look upon her fuzzy face because of Jason's tone

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Wed Nov 20, 2013 3:18 pm

Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Tumblr_manys1ndgV1qdxxyt

Livia,

Livia stared at the boy. He seemed cold, just the way she was. Cold and hardened by grief. She could see he felt the same way that she did. A wound had been opened and a band-aid of toughness had been placed over it. Livia doubted that she would ever be the same again. All she wanted to do was forget those terrible groans. She regarded saving herself the most selfish thing she had ever done - the most selfless too. Livia believed that she was better off in Hades - it must have been better than living the guilt of killing her brother. But at the same time, the people in her life needed her, even though she was not much help in this shattered state. It would kill Quell and Faye to see her fragile body already broken. Hadn’t they suffered enough already because of her?

Guessing that she had gotten the boy’s name right (he responded to it), Livia shook her head. ”This camp - full of heroes - is a lie. We aren’t heroes.” She felt betrayed. Livia had grown up training thinking that she would be a hero someday. She tried her hardest to become a good swordsman - that way she could save someone when they needed help. She would be able to defend herself and her friends from the monsters. But despite the several times Livia had fought actual monsters, she ended up using her skills for the worst thing that Livia could imagine doing. If she was a worse fighter, than maybe she would have been taken down. Or she would not feel this much guilt for getting away with her life.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

"Chiron claims that we are all heroes, that every hero has their shadow, their monster within. All I see in myself is the monster. Sometimes I wish i had died out in the apocalypse." John answers Livia. He notices huxleigh looking up and giving him a glare telling him that he better not die... Funny how he was taking advice from a dog

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Fri Dec 13, 2013 12:00 pm

Livia,

A still, cruel smile spread to Livia’s face. She hated it, she hated the stupidity of her own feelings, but Livia could do nothing to prevent that. She disgusted herself. What had she done? Because she wasn’t running away from her feelings -

she was running away from herself.

Might as well. Livia had nowhere else to go. She might as well lock that monster inside a box and throw away the key.

Maybe that was the answer then. It would come back, but throwing away her sorrows would work better than ‘therapy’ or anything else anyone had ever suggested. That monster would emerge from Livia every once in a while, but the old Liv was still there under this polished skeleton of a girl. ”Don’t we all.” Livia said, the grim smiling quickly dropping from her face.

”Funny how we pretend to be these saviors. Because everyone knows that we’re all just selfish monsters inside.” Livia spat. She wished she had died. Everyone said that she was brave - that she would’ve been missed, but Livia kind of doubted it.

They were probably better off without her anyways.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

John picked up on the change in her expression and tone almost instantly. "Something wrong?" He askes the girl sitting across from him. John looks at liv cautiously, something was certainly off. He began to wonder if he could get on of the campers from some cabin that could hypnotize her and make her be normal again.

Subject: Re: Those bloody hands of mine (Jason) Tue Dec 31, 2013 12:59 pm

Livia,

Livia’s smiled turned to one of harsh savagery. ”There’s always something wrong.” She said, and her words rang more truth than anything she had said in days. Finally, Livia was confident - at least that she was a psychopath with no moral compass.

John looked like he wanted to help. Liv wanted to push him away. Anyone who wanted to help her was wasting their time. She couldn’t be convinced that she was doing nothing wrong. Livia wouldn’t be hypnotized into thinking she had done the right thing. She was too in control of her own mind - or was she anymore?

Surely if she was so in control, she would not be so sadistic. Or maybe that was where that nature came from. They said power came with a price - maybe the power over her own head had lost Livia her sense of right and wrong - of bravery and of selfishness.

Oh something was certainly off with Livia Malcolm. Something would always be off.

Posts : 286 Join date : 2012-09-23

John looked Liv in the eyes. He could tell that she looked unstable from how she was. He shook his head as he looked over at the girl. "You are a daughter of Athena. You csn at least get control of your mind!" He says to the girl in order to get her to get up and move. As a last resort to try to get the girl back ro reality

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