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Camp Half Blood is the sister site of Camp Jupiter.

 

 Iven's Charries

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Iven




Posts : 5
Join date : 2012-08-21

Iven's Charries Empty
PostSubject: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeWed Aug 22, 2012 8:57 am

Half-Bloods
Name: Eisa Langford
Age/Birthday: Sixteen, Fourth of July
Gender: Female
God Parent: Hephestus
Claimed: Yes
Mortal Family: Launa Langford, Mother, Aged Forty-Five. James Stevens, Step-Father, Aged Forty-Two. Connie Stevens, Fifteen, Step-Sister
Years in Camp: Four

Appearance: Eisa stands at Four Foot, six inches and weighs Nine Stone Four Pounds. Her hair is Short and Cropped and coloured a lovely shade of Chocolate Brown. Her right eye is Electric Blue while her left eye is Emerald Green. Her skin is smooth and Caucasian. Her lips are a glossy Pink Colour while her nails are painted a delicate shade of Red.On her feet Eisa wears a pair of White socks. Over the top of these she wears a pair of Jet Black, Combat boots. Eisa wears a white vest and a pair of dark brown shorts. Over the top of these Eisa also wears an orange Jumpsuit, similar to what a prisoner might wear. Her jumpsuit has a zipper on the front that she keeps zipped up to her Neck.On the right shoulder of her jumpsuit is a small image of a smiley face, on the other is the symbol of her father. The jumpsuit isn't perfectly orange, there are splatters of an unknown black substance here and there upon the suit. On her right hand Eisa wears a black, fingerless leather glove.

Weapons: Eisa wields a broadsword. The handle is made from a combination of Oak and Steel. The blade is made from Celestial Bronze, though it looks as though it could be made purely from steel. The Blade attaches to a harness on her back. In the camp, it is visible as the broadsword, while in the Mortal World it is viewed as a backpack until she needs it. Eisa calls the sword 'Asgard.'

Personality: Eisa is a confident young woman. She is opiniated, not afraid to say what she thinks. She can be described as being 'Brutally Honest.' Eisa is known for being one to strictly follow rules. She is a no nonesense teenager and when she wants something she will strive to get it, for better or for worse, not dealing with the consequences until afterwards.

Fatal Flaw: Hubris - Extreme Pride or Arrogance. Hubris often indicates a loss of contactwith reality and an overestimation of one's own competence or capabilities. Hubris like many Fatal flaws is a mental weakness something which has always existed within Eisa's mind.
Pets: None

Talents:

- Technokinesis, The Ability to Manipulate Machines, by physically animating them and controlling them like puppets. To communicate with Machines and technology such as Cars, Vacuums or any other machine. So long as those machines are either switched on or using Electricity.

- Can Build almost anything.

Other: Eisa is Bisexual
Summer

Brief History: Eisa has always lived with her family, she lives in a New York Apartment close to Central Park. Eisa attends a New York High school with her step-sister during the Summer. When Eisa was Twelve Eisa and Connie were attacked by a Cyclopes on the way home from school. It wasn't long that Eisa's mother took her aside and explained her parentage. That Summer Eisa and Connie were sent to Camp Half Blood, where Eisa has stayed every summer. During the School Term, she goes to her high school alone.


Last edited by Iven on Thu Aug 23, 2012 4:41 am; edited 3 times in total
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Iven




Posts : 5
Join date : 2012-08-21

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeWed Aug 22, 2012 8:57 am

Character 2:
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Iven




Posts : 5
Join date : 2012-08-21

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeWed Aug 22, 2012 8:57 am

Character 3:
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dean
Experienced Poster



Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 31

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeWed Aug 22, 2012 9:30 am

        Hello Iven!

        Welcome to Camp Half-Blood, before I can accept your characters, you need to hange a couple of things.

        1) Spelling mistakes - there are quite a few spelling mistakes in your application, maybe run it through a grammar check in Google or find an online one.

        2) Fatal Flaw - can you elaborate on "hubris", tell us why this is a fatal flaw, and where it comes from that your character is like that, maybe something that happened in the past?

        3) Appearance - I'm sorry but splitting it up like you did is not allowed. Please just use the information you already have written down to create a paragraph of 4 sentences or more.

        4) Talents - Unfortunately your powers are a bit extreme. Maybe. Add some flaws to the powers? Tell us about the limits of those powers and things he cannot do either yet or at all in comparison with other Hephaestus Children.

        Thank you very much,
        Dean.
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Iven




Posts : 5
Join date : 2012-08-21

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeWed Aug 22, 2012 1:14 pm

Ok...Dean sorted out the spelling mistakes if there is any I have missed please feel free to point them out. I have 'Elaborated' on Her fatal flaw. I have it on good ahem a good source that my characters appearance layout is not a rule but a prefference for setting a characters bio out. If it is a rule feel free to point it out. Oh and erm dumbed down Eisa's standard powers for a hephestus child down I hope it's too your liking.
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dean
Experienced Poster



Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 31

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeThu Aug 23, 2012 2:00 am

        Hello Iven!

        I like it all very much except still the appearance which is unfortunate..it as I said is against the rules to do it like that, I a sorry if you got this impression...
        And trust me I would know, that's what I'm a Character Mod for hahaha

        Thanks again,
        Dean.
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Iven




Posts : 5
Join date : 2012-08-21

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeThu Aug 23, 2012 4:43 am

Ok...So I have changed her Appearance...is it ok now?
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dean
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Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 31

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PostSubject: Re: Iven's Charries   Iven's Charries I_icon_minitimeThu Aug 23, 2012 2:52 pm

* accepted!
-----------Much better :D thank you!
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