| | Eternally | Vampire Genre. |  |
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+5jessica maddie ☹ *~MoonHalo~* albatross dean 9 posters |
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tethys
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4230
Join date : 2010-05-13
Age : 25
 |  Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre.  Fri Jan 21, 2011 3:54 pm | |
| It's kind of short, but there's a lot of detail and description. When are you going to add the next chapter? :] | |
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maddie ☹
Grammar Police
Posts : 3985
Join date : 2010-05-30
Age : 25
Location : ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Fri Jan 21, 2011 6:00 pm | |
| NOOO. I HAVEN'T EVEN READ BURNED YET. UGH. | |
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dean
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 30
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Wed Jan 26, 2011 8:29 am | |
| I've read Awakened XD New parts'll come soon I hope xD | |
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Zan
Mega Asshole Duo
Posts : 10035
Join date : 2010-05-04
Age : 27
Location : butthole PA
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Wed Jan 26, 2011 3:48 pm | |
| I hate you, Dean. >.> You suck. | |
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dean
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 30
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Wed Jan 26, 2011 9:49 pm | |
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jessica
SICJ A WPMDERF; MEMBER
Posts : 3522
Join date : 2010-10-09
Age : 26
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Fri Mar 04, 2011 3:48 am | |
| Awwwwwww! Don't be sad Dean! Smilez!!!!!! :D | |
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tethys
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4230
Join date : 2010-05-13
Age : 25
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Fri Mar 04, 2011 8:56 pm | |
| I like the fanciness! How you put it in a fancy font, and with the italics, and stuff :] | |
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jessica
SICJ A WPMDERF; MEMBER
Posts : 3522
Join date : 2010-10-09
Age : 26
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Mon Mar 07, 2011 3:41 am | |
| LOL Tethys! liked that too! Write more Dean! | |
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tethys
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4230
Join date : 2010-05-13
Age : 25
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Mon Mar 07, 2011 7:59 pm | |
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Guest
Guest
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Thu Mar 17, 2011 12:56 pm | |
| Feedback:
Er, the sentences are choppy, now that I actually read it and there are a few unnecessary repetitive words. I would recommend being more descriptive and fluent in your sentences because that would keep me lingering for more.
Personal Opinion:
Overall, it was well-written and seemingly okay for the vampire-fantasy genre, not that that's a problem nor issue; it just doesn't fit my taste. |
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dean
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 30
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Fri Apr 01, 2011 1:50 am | |
| I'm not continuing it, it's just a teaser, once I finished it, get it to my uncle and published you'll get to buy it and read it :D | |
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dean
Experienced Poster
Posts : 4384
Join date : 2010-07-08
Age : 30
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Fri Jun 10, 2011 4:46 am | |
| Ah, can't be bother to write a WHOLE book so here is some more I wrote! (It'll be in the first post, just continued... | |
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SeaSeaweedbrain
Posts : 549
Join date : 2011-05-15
Age : 26
Location : At home in bed..
| | Subject: Re: Eternally | Vampire Genre. Sat Jun 11, 2011 5:28 am | |
| I like the idea. Very interesting. | |
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