are you a saint or a sinner || Caletian

sebastian williams - - - -

The walk to the infirmary seemed like a short one to Sebastian. He wasn’t sure if it was because he was still full of adrenaline, or if his ADHD was acting up, or if it was because of Cale right beside him. It didn’t matter to him, really. He just wanted to get there so he could get his black eye tended too. Along the way Fey was creating a backstory as to how he gained his injury, because saying he got beat up by a boy he suddenly felt attraction towards would never do. Even if he didn’t have friends, Fey still had a reputation to uphold as the icy demigod who beat everyone in a fight, and Cale wouldn’t ruin that status for him. Still, Sebastian found himself staring even more and more at Cale through his one eye, the other covered by his hand. With the other one, the boy absentmindedly scratched his scalp, getting all of the sand out of his dark coffee coloured hair. He didn’t like particles of anything lying in his scalp, and he was annoyed. 

- - - - - fighting til the war's won

sebastian williams - - - -

As he walked further into the infirmary and farther away from Cale, Sebastian muttered under his breath, “Likewise.” Fey knew that if he hadn’t wandered from his bed this morning he wouldn’t be in this predicament. He wouldn’t have a throbbing, painful black eye the size of Africa. He wouldn’t have gotten his clothes dirty and his shoes scuffed up. But most of all, he wouldn’t be tearing himself up inside over this boy. Cale wasn’t even that important. There was nothing that he could offer Sebastian that could make him want to hang out with more. And yet, with every second he was with the mysterious demigod, Fey knew that he didn’t want to leave him. These feelings were weird, and unwanted, but they were there and they were there to stay. Sebastian turned his neck to gaze at Cale as he crashed through the infirmary doors, noting how amazing he looked even with a broken and bruised jaw. He allowed himself a small, minuscule scowl before narrowing his blue eyes and grimacing at the other boy. He walked over to the fridge and grabbed himself a packet of nectar, making sure to keep as far away from Cale as possible. It wasn’t because he didn’t want the other boy to think that he didn’t like him, because Fey did like Cale. From the moment they knocked into each other and beat each other up Fey liked Cale. But it was difficult to show it when he had been boarded up for so long, and when he wasn’t sure if the boy liked him back. Sebastian drank half the bottle in one gulp, not realising how thirsty he was, considering he hadn’t had even a sip of water since he began running. The drink tasted of orange juice, the citrus flavour hydrating him and healing him at the same time. 

After he had drowned himself in nectar, Sebastian got an ice pack, put it over his eye, and sat on an unoccupied bed, frowning. “We just had a kiss, an amazing kiss, and you want to forget about that?” He didn’t believe that Cale wanted to forget it entirely. At first, Fey thought it was because he was a bad kisser, that he was stupid and inexperienced, and that in the eyes of someone like Cale he was nothing but a one time fling to be tossed into a dark corner filled with dust and forgotten. Then he decided that he was perfect, damn it, and that there wasn’t anything wrong with him rather than there was something wrong with Cale because who wouldn’t want to hook up with a hot demigod such as Sebastian Fey Williams? Maybe there was a screw missing in Cale’s brain… Yes, that was the reason that Fey decided upon. “Dude there was literally no one there, you don’t need to go around punching people. Besides,” He said, laying down with his hands behind his head, feeling the power of the nectar soothe his aches and pains. Soon there wouldn’t be the need for an ice pack. “you can’t deny you enjoyed kissing me.” There was that cocky tone that Sebastian always carried around with him like some battle armour. 

- - - - - fighting til the war's won

sebastian williams - - - -

As he walked along the path back to his cabin, Sebastian wrapped his arms tightly around himself, keeping his head down low. Now he wished it wasn’t so nice out, because he wanted something to feel as crappy as he did, and even the sky wouldn’t grant him that simple request. He was positive that Cale didn’t feel like shit, like a complete fool. Fey was a fool. He had let his guard down again, too quickly and too soon, even when he thought he had nothing to lose. But after years and years of being alone and acting like a snarky asshole, Fey thought that maybe, just maybe, the gods would have granted him with somebody who would want to be with him. Obviously Cale didn’t feel that way about Fey, and Sebastian had a hole in his heart from just a simple kiss, which was now a mistake. Sebastian didn’t listen to the other boys excuses as to why they needed to forget what had happened on the lake. Fey hated excuses, he hated lies and he hated people now more than ever. He just wanted to go back into his small bed with his dying cat, Lego, and sleep for a while. At least in dreams he could pretend this never happened. Cale could probably go spread rumours about Fey now, about how weak he was and irrational and it would all be true. Sebastian was just so tired of pretending to be the tough guy that deep down he never could be. The demigod was too much like his dead mother, and being all ice cold was too much effort.

Sebastian was too wrapped up in making it to his bed that he didn’t notice Cale running after him, calling his name, and it wasn’t until he felt a spray of dirt and gravel on his already massacred pant leg did the boy look down and finally see him. “So you couldn’t stay away, huh?” Fey said, smiling coldly, like he was a villain instead of a hero. “That’s okay, because I can stay away from you.” It was weird to see Cale here, pleading for him to stay. He didn’t think that Cale cared enough to run after him, after all, he certainly didn’t care enough to apologise… Wait. No, there was an apology issuing from the other demigods lips. It was bittersweet, and Fey wasn’t sure if he believed it at first or not. But Cale did seem sincere about it, and so the boys piercing gaze softened like melted butter. 

- - - - - fighting til the war's won

sebastian williams - - - -

As Cale apologised again, Fey just rolled his eyes. A lot of people were bad at a lot of things. Still, he didn’t want silence to overtake them because then something might happen. Fey could kiss Cale again, and he didn’t want the boy to think that they had a chance, because it was clear to him that they didn’t. The lake was a horrible coincidence, but a great lesson to Sebastian; never venture outside your bedroom. “Yeah and I’m bad at making soufflés. Also knitting, I’m rubbish at knitting.” The mask of scarcest and snark was really a cry for help, because the demigod didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want Cale to leave him, but he didn’t want to think they had something. Whatever spark they had had been extinguished with the lake water that had soaked through Fey’s jeans. In all honestly, he was really horrible at commitment and knowing when to stop being an ass. Obviously this wasn’t the time to be mean to Cale, and so Sebastian just shook his head, displeased with everything like he always was, and ran back to the cabin. He was running away from Cale, running away from love and running away from happiness all because he was scared. His mother had made him feel like the best person in the world, and when she left Sebastian was so afraid of losing another person he cared for. He didn’t want to lose Cale as well. 

He slammed the door to his cabin, running his tan hands through his thick dark brown hair. Fey kicked one of the end tables in the living room, frustrated with himself. You can’t get caught up in love, Williams, you know that and you’re such a goddamn idiot for kissing Cale. Usually his anger issues weren’t outbursts like this, they were more mental than physical. It only got this bad when Sebastian was at a dead end with no where to go and no one to turn too. He had no friends he could rant to, again, the whole losing them thing. Fey thought he was being rational about his rule of commitment, after all, demigods usually only lived for about 3 years after they found out their parentage, and anyone who lived to adulthood was basically a god in Sebastian’s eyes. Even if he and Cale did get together, one would die and Fey just had a feeling deep down in his gut that it was going to be Cale, and then he would have to walk this earth alone and he couldn’t do that again. Don’t fall in love with him. Don’t do it. You know what happens to people you care about. They always die and it’s always your fault. 

- - - - - fighting til the war's won

sebastian williams - - - -

Sebastian hated when people see him cry. It’s a sign of weakness, a sign that somebody or something has touched you the best way, left you speechless and breathless to the point of infatuation and then they go and break your heart by doing something as stupid as leaving them. The last time Fey cried was when his mother died, leaving him alone in this world with no family or connections. He hadn’t been mad at her, of course, it wasn’t her fault she had incurable cancer and died in just six short months. Sebastian knew she had tried her best, and that was all he could hope for. Still, Cale wasn’t his mother. Fey could still lose him and he was afraid and angry and so he cried. He hoped Cale wouldn’t say anything about it. Sebastian had actually  stopped crying when Cale came in through the door, and he had composed himself quite nicely he thought. “I love Italian, and I would have made you drive me anyways. You’re taking me on a date, so you have to pay for everything and treat me nice.”
 
 
 
Fey looks at himself in the mirror, trying to decide if he looks good enough for tonight’s date. He wasn’t entirely sure where they were going, minus that it would be Italian based food. The demigod had settled with an old collared shirt that he had stolen from one of his siblings, almost certain that they wouldn’t mind. Even if they did Sebastian would beat them black and blue, telling them that it was for the greater good and that he wasn’t going to mess this up for him. There were butterflies in his stomach. Fey took this as excitement. Truthfully he had never been on a date before, expect if you counted recess in kindergarten, which he certainly didn’t. He wore a blue tie, the colour of the night sky before it was completely pitch black and sparkling with stars. Fey had also found a black blazer he had donned after he slipped on black pants and shoes. He was really hoping they weren’t going to some fast food restaurant like valentinos, as he didn’t want to be overdressed and feel like an idiot. If they did happen to end up there Fey could just take off the blazer and tie, giving him a more casual look.
 
When a girl called his name, Sebastian went down, hoping that his siblings wouldn’t notice the lovestruck grin on his face. He went down the stairs and saw Cale. Gods he was beautiful. Fey had reeled in a good one, that was for sure. “Thank you darling, I do try.” Sebastian said in a faux british accent. He put his hands on Cale’s shoulders, looking him straight in the eye. “No but in all seriousness Cale I always look great no matter what. Never forget that.” He stepped back, releasing the other boy. “After you, my date from hell.” Fey had lots of witty names he loved to use on Cale, he just hoped the other boy wouldn’t mind him being sarcastic almost all the time. Fey followed Cale to his car, hardly speaking. It would be a crime to disrupt this silence of awkwardness. He let his mind wander a bit, thinking about the time his mother was well enough to take him on a picnic. Eventually it turned into a mother/son day, twilight ending with them looking over the golden gate bridge. Fey thought that he would like to do that with Cale someday, if his memories would allow him to do so. “Your car better not be a shitty Honda accord because if it is I swear to all the gods I will dump your ass right now.”

But when Sebastian actually saw the car, the perfect red Ferrari he almost melted, almost fell to his knees. “My boyfriend has a Ferrari…” Fey whispered, not even noticing the label which he put Cale under. He was in awe, in shock. “My boyfriend has a Ferrari.” He said a little bit louder, as if he couldn’t believe it. “MY BOYFRIEND HAS A FREAKING FERRARI HOLY GODS ON OLYMPUS DO YOU SEE THIS?!” Fey shouted, laughing as well. He wrapped his arms around Cale’s neck hugging him quite loosely and pecking him on the forehead before sprinting over to the car, marveling at the red exterior. He got into the passenger seat, still buzzing with excitement. “I love this can we have dinner in the car please?” He asked Cale with large puppy eyes, even though he knew the answer was no.
 
After a few more minutes of silence and Fey literally stroking the dash, they finally dived into conversation. “Well I mean I do have to spend quite a lot of time with this hot boy I ran into so I don’t know…” But then Sebastian chuckles. “I’m kidding. I have no friends and I completely forget my responsibilities so I’m free for basically forever.” He was relieved when he found out they were going somewhere nice. He hadn’t stolen this suit for nothing after all. “Cale you should totally fly over a speed bump.” Sebastian said, a glint that could almost be considered maniac in his eyes.

sebastian williams - - - -

The demigod chuckles at Cale’s remarks of another much crappier car and dumping him. “My mom used to drive a honda that had those crank down windows and it was so covered in rust I didn’t know what the original colour was. Gods it was absolutely terrible.” Remembering his mom made Fey’s smile diminish into something that might be considered a frown. Thinking about her, about the life he used to have and how happy he was, made him homesick for the past. It also hurt knowing he could have done more, tons more, to save her. “Keep in mind she could have afforded more, but mom thought cars didn’t need to be fancy and stuff. Just a good enough one to get around. Obviously she was wrong as hell.” As a child, Sebastian had been rich because his mother owned a series of hotels all across California. He would have been well off today if his mother hadn’t spent all their money on treatment. Besides, even if he did have a ton of cash, Fey would have most likely blown it off on a car like Cale. Quickly shaking his head and clearing his thoughts of the past or his mother, Fey smiled once again. “You do that and I will beat your ass so hard your grandchildren will feel it."

Not wanting to seem like Fey wants to advance their relationship, he quickly covered himself with a mischievous and sly smile, his signature. “No, not boyfriend. You’re my friend that’s a boy, and I can’t really say ‘friendboy' without sounding like an idiot. I’m all about sounding intelligent, you know.” His voice is very convincing, and even he would believe it. Cale is great and all, but Sebastian couldn’t date someone who spends their money on expensive suits. The car, fine. The suit? Hell to the no. Besides, with his past record of loves won and loss, Sebastian knew his chances with the boy were slim to none, and so he wasn’t even going to try to advance their somewhat friendship into something more. Although, if he didn’t care what Cale thought of him, why was he wearing a stolen suit? And why did he act like a fool around him? Fey perceived this as something other than being in love. He couldn’t be in love. Could he? He’d spent so much precious time over the years guarding his heart with stone walls that were virtually impenetrable, and Sebastian would not have them crumble due to Cale. If that happened, not only would their relationship falter and be destroyed, but so would Fey’s entire life and moral values. Fey also thought he had a curse placed upon him, and if he hell head over heels for this demigod, Cale would probably die a horrible death or something. Sebastian wouldn’t let that happen. Not to Cale.

Fey laughs as Cale talks about the rules of his car. The boy understands, and even though the suspicious and daring glint in his eyes says otherwise, he’d never in a million years overstep any of the boundaries his friend set for him. Underneath the sarcasm and need to be a bad kid, Fey was a child of obedience and love. Maybe if their friendship held out for a certain number of years, Sebastian would slowly strip down his defences for the other demigod. He doubted it though. The only living thing that the boy showed any kind of compassion and feelings for was his extremely aged cat, Lego. “Ooh, so serious.” Fey pouted, but he was joking. Almost everything he ever said or was was a joke of some sort. He nodded as Cale told him his plan for after dinner, approving. “I like that idea. Although I don’t like that you won’t go full speed. Come on, take some risk, live a little.” Fey urged, his smile never again faltering.

sebastian williams - - - -

It was nice being around Cale, Sebastian decided. He needed someone who would joke around with him and drive him around to the places he wanted to go. Fey didn’t notice it before, in the rush of things, but Cale looked very good in a suit. The demigod wished he would’ve told him so back at the cabin, with a sly smile and bright eyes. It was too late now, as the compliment would have felt forced and rushed and oh so very awkward. Besides, if Fey didn’t even want a relationship with the kid, it would be stupid to tell him he looked good in a suit. Oh but gods Cale looked good, and Fey only wished that he would have spent a little more time on his appearance. Cale obviously cared a great deal about how he looked, and Sebastian didn’t usually, mostly just wearing sweatpants and soft feeling t-shirts of assorted colours and patterns, most of them being worn from years of usage. But now that he was with Cale, it felt wrong to be underdressed, and if Fey wasn’t a pompous prat he would blush a deep red and crawl down under the seat. However, he wasn’t the kind of person to get embarrassed easily, and so he ignored his conscious and tried not the stare at Cale. The other boy made a comment about his mothers car. Fey nodded in agreement, his smile never faltering. “That could be arranged.” The demigod remarked about the nightmare of the car from hell. Being a son of Morpheus, Sebastian could manipulate dreams and turn them into shadowy nightmares, wrecked with long, spindly spiders and howling hellhounds that tore at your skin. Of course he was kidding about that statement. and unless Cale pissed him off and Fey needed revenge, Sebastian wouldn’t actually give him nightmares of his mom’s old Honda. The boy laughed for what seemed like the millionth time that night. It was so easy to laugh with Cale around. He felt positively euphoric. “I don’t think you realise what I’m capable of.” Although Cale is right, Fey wasn’t going to give him that satisfaction.

Sebastian didn’t want a boyfriend, didn’t want a relationship, didn’t want to worry about anniversaries or shit. So the fact that he was a little put-down when Cale sighed was unwanted and stupid. There were too many complications when it came to the demigod and dating, although he never tried it. Fey was basically afraid of lowering his defences and A) Getting his heart stomped on or B) Having Cale die too soon, or maybe C) A nice, slow, torturous mixture of both. The demigod knew that dating the other boy would never work, not even the the most opposite parallel universe where his mother was still alive and he was nice would the two of them dating work out. None of the stars held their names like constellations, telling them they were meant to be. Then again, Fey wasn't superstitious so he didn’t believe in all that astronomical crap. “Friendboy: A story about an ordinary sucky teen. Coming to a theatre near you never.” Sebastian added, moving his hands as if revelling a banner of the poster itself. “Yeah, it does, doesn’t it?” 

“Oh see you can’t resist me and my needs. But it’s okay, no one can. I’m just too devilishly handsome for people to ignore.” Sebastian smirks, feeling triumphant that they were going to go full speed. The demigod was used to fast. Fast cars, fast homework assignments, fast everything. The one and only thing he wanted to go slow like syrup was sleep. Oh gods did Fey love his sleep, and relished every second of it. If he wasn’t with Cale at the moment, he’d most likely be in his bed either sleeping or eating a box of pizza with his frankly old and dying cat. Usually his odd sleeping habits had him go to bed at around one in the morning and not being woken up until about eleven hours later. You couldn’t disturb Sebastian while he was sleeping, and if you did well then Zeus have mercy on your soul. Fey laughs again. “Who do I look like? Bill Gates? I’m poor!” But not even a second later does he feel guilty. If they did get a ticket it would kind of be on his head, for pressuring Cale. “Alright fine, I think I have a dollar or two I can spare.” Then Sebastian waited for Cale to talk again and for them to arrive at the restaurant.