mini rant about stupid theatre stuff

idk i just had to get this out and ik its been my first post in forever and i'll explain why in a sec.

legitimately it feels like everything in my life is falling apart. my friends are all stressed beyond belief, and we're stressing each other out. this week is the dance concert and the quarter ends next week so I have a ton of projects due plus I'm not getting home until 8 pm every night. i dont have any time to relax and calm down or take any time for myself except during my commutes to and from school cause my lunch periods and after school time are being taken up by dance.

I'm stage managing the dance concert which is extremely difficult, so i not only have to be able to call the show, but i also have to know every piece mostly by heart. it's super difficult and tiring and I've only seen some pieces once or twice and the show is friday.its insanely stressful, especially because there's no way to figure out standbys or pace yourself without memorizing the piece. and to make it all worse, the stage manager for the other half of the show is such a control freak. he's pretty cool most of the time but he won't let me call the show my way and keeps trying to make me do it his way. he doesn't want me to let the light board operator think for herself, which is super stupid cause if something goes wrong then i dont want to have to micromanage the light board and sound and backstage. and to make things worse, he changed the order of the calling book (which is the book that says during each dance which lights should be changed and at what time), so it's really confusing and inefficient. I put up with it for a few days even if it involved several huge mistakes that could be really big problems in the real show bc ik it can go in chronological order when i actually call the pieces, but then today the director changed the order of some of the pieces and i just broke down.

the fact that piece number 1 in show a started at cue 111 made perfect sense, and if we were to go in chronological order, show a would run 111-300ish (there aren't actually 200 different settings btw), and we've had problems with not knowing the right cue to switch into before, but now I'm super annoyed because the order of the pieces used to be one thing that i didnt have to worry about, but now whenever we change pieces during the real show, I'm gonna have to worry about gels and dancers and sound and the last thing i need is to have to manually enter into the next light cue.

yea so thats kinda why i haven't been on just ignore me I'm mad.